Communikasionsmedier

When I was little, we used to play the game “telephone.”  For those of you who do not know what this game consists of, let me iron out the details for you.  If you sit down and one person starts a message from one end of the line and it just gets passed down by word of mouth.  You could whisper, “I’m wearing sweat pants,” and the end message could come out as, “Baboons are yellow.”  Somewhere down the line, the message got mixed up, and it turned into something completely different.

Communication seems to be the root of most of the problems that we experience within our own families and homes. Where we go wrong is within the way that we send our messages and then when they are received.  Based on the person sending the message or receiving it, I don’t think that there is ONE way to communicate correctly.

Every week we had family home evening, and we always talked about how we could do better to communicate as a family.  My dad always said, “We need to communicate better.”  He was right, we were terrible at communicating.  Here’s where I think we struggled, at least I did.  I was always afraid of saying what I REALLY felt or what I REALLY wanted to do. So I would say what I thought everyone wanted to hear, but I would internalize how I really felt and be bitter. Direction came our way, and we secretly complained, but we never said anything.

As I look back, I wish I could have expressed how I felt better and more accurately.  I also wish I listened to what other people had to say too.  I sometimes feel as though I listen to respond, instead of listening to understand.  “First, seek to understand.  Then, seek to BE understood.” 

Communication is a two way street.  I wish I was honest with how I really felt and what I really wanted.  I always just expressed myself based on what other people wanted to hear and I was unable to really hold my own ground and really muster up enough courage to really express myself.  I don’t really know WHY I never felt comfortable with being who I wanted to be or with expressing myself in ways that I should have. 

As I look to raising my own family, and to building relationships with those who are around me, I’m trying to do better about just LISTENING and trying to understand people, before I jump to conclusions and assume things. I know that I’m imperfect with it, but if I work at it, I can be better. 

Til you read again,

-me